Grand Theft Auto Monkey

Anyone who knows me knows that I love anything monkey related. So when a friend called me and said ” I know you love monkeys so I had to call and tell you about this.” He works for one of the big three auto dealers and received a repair order for a vehicle that read ” replace all interior destroyed by monkey ” after re-reading and puzzling over the wording he examined the SUV. Sure enough the whole interior of the vehicle had been destroyed, chunks were bitten out of the seats, dash, headliner, steering wheel and any pliable surface that a monkey could get its mouth on ! ” It looked like something went ape shit crazy ( literally ) !” he said. It was a total disaster inside this new SUV, all of the interior had to be replaced ! ” I bet State Farm will never believe this shit !” he said in between catching his breath from laughing. I was dying on the other end of the phone, laughing as I pictured this monkey going on a rampage inside this vehicle ripping and biting everything as he has a tantrum. But then it gets better. It turns out that the monkey isn’t even the guys pet, the monkey belongs to his girlfriend and the monkey doesn’t like this dude ! Him and his girlfriend have an argument and she throws the monkey in his SUV, locks the doors and tosses the keys into the woods. While he’s looking for keys the monkey is getting mad and going crazy, when he finds the keys and unlocks the door the monkey tries to attack him. So, he shuts the door and the monkey continues to destroy his new SUV because he’s really pissed now that the dude he doesn’t like has tried to catch him ! The monkey is finally apprehended and removed from the vehicle but not before he causes over 10k in damages. I have a great imagination and the visions in my head of this monkey vandalizing this SUV from the inside make me laugh ever time I think about it. Try to explain that to your insurance agent. True Story